'But all lives matter'

Saying "All Lives Matter" as a response to "Black Lives Matter" is like saying the fire department should spray down all houses in a neighborhood, even if only one house is on fire, because all the houses matter. And yes, your house does matter. One hundred per cent. But your house is not on fire. - Keegan Micheal Key (based on the cartoon by Kris Straub)

'But my family has always called it that'

Read Rawinia Higgins' article on The Spinoff: Mangling Māori names is no longer 'the way it is'

". . . Was quite right to say that these were the pronunciations she grew up with. But that does not make those pronunciations the best choice. While we can’t ever get our voices entirely away from the way we were brought up, we have a choice."

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'But that's reverse racism'

Watch this video from Huffpost

Minorities have fewer opportunities to express prejudice against white people, and they lack the institutional power that protects them if they do. Reverse racism doesn't exist. In Layla F. Saad's words: "Racism is prejudice plus power" meaning that although marginalised racial groups might have prejudices, they can never be racist as they don't have the systemic power that white supremacy affords Pākehā. This argument is often targeted at affirmative action or quota programs, a response to that would be to look at understanding how widespread racism disadvantages people of colour getting a job or a place in a university, and that these programs are needed to help level the playing field.

'But I/we/they didn't mean it like that'

This is a common reaction to people being called out for racism, because they don't want to confront having done something wrong. Have a look at the sandals and boots metaphor on the analogies pages - if you step on someones feet, you understand that you caused harmed even though you didn't mean to, and so you should apologise. This is the same with being racist. If a person of colour feels it was racist, then it is racist. Your job is to learn what you did wrong, no matter your intention, and not do it again. 

'But I treat everyone the same regardless of their race/we're all just one human race'

Even if you think you don't treat people differently because of their colour, being raised in a society full of white supremacy means we inevitably hold an unconscious bias that influences the way we treat people. You can test your own unconscious bias with Harvard Universities Project Implicit. Saying you are colourblind also supports the illusion that we are racism does not exist and that POC's experiences of racism aren't real. 

'But I didn't colonise anyone/thats in history/we should just move on'

Although you may not have been there or actively harmed people in the past, you inevitably uphold institutional racism by not confronting and dismantling white supremacy in your own life and in your community. The effects of colonisation still disadvantage Māori, and still privilege you. We cannot move on until the harms done in the past have been reconciled and we have a truly equitable society.